Party of One

Isn’t it ironic how 45% of adults over 18 are single, yet being in a relationship is still so prized by society?

Seriously. 

Have you noticed that once you hit a certain age people just expect you to settle down and have kids?

And listen, both of those things are amazing.

But can we go back and talk about one of those words: settle.

I talked about this in my mini-episode last week, but people really do have a penchant for settling, especially as they get older.

They fear being alone, and suddenly don’t find being with the wrong one to be such a turn-off.

Popular culture makes it sound like if you aren’t rushing to find someone, you’re destined to forever be a spinster.

As if a person’s worth or only purpose in life is to seek marriage and a family.

At 31 years young, I most definitely have dated the wrong men, and while I have no regrets, as each one taught me something…it doesn’t mean I want to do it again.

We need to normalize loving ourselves and being about our business. Because only then will the right person come along. When you are prioritizing finding a partner because you are bored, or lonely, you are setting yourself up for heartbreak, and ultimately: unhappiness.

I go on dates with myself, travel by myself, and go to concerts by myself. And while some gasp, or express pity, I feel liberated. And in those situations, I have made some of my best friends. 

I never want my worth to feel tied to another person. I truly believe that dating and settling down is about someone adding to your life. 

A significant amount of people don’t know how to be alone, and that’s what is really sad. They have no identity or sense of self.

But on the flip side, if you’re single – enjoy it, but don’t become bitter! Ah, who am I kidding? There is absolutely zero reasons you will become bitter.

If you’re short on time, here are some perks to being single:

  1. You have more sex, and who doesn’t love a good (and routine) orgasm?
  2. There’s more time to nourish your friendships.
  3. You can leave your mark on society as an individual
  4. You can walk around your home naked, and not a single soul will tell you no
  5. No one to steal your covers or have the audacity to fart in your bed
  6. Your money is yours
  7. Science also says you’re healthier and less stressed

So put the phone down, and stop swiping.

Hear more on the podcast

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