The Girl in Gucci Glasses

We are all allowed a dumb bitch moment or two – I mean, if we were perfect, where would the fun be in life?

But when you hit a certain point in life, you realize that making the same poor decisions will only end in heartache, anger, and unresolved sexual frustrations.

So if you’re looking for a sign to stop the toxic back and forth with your ex – here you go, baby girl.

Listen, I get it…shit is hard. I remember when I was new to dating as a young twentysomething, and I took breakups as a sign of personal failure.

As I aged, I realized the entire purpose of dating was realizing whether or not someone was your vibe – and that sometimes people just don’t vibe, and that’s okay!

That’s not to say I wasn’t a total pick me at some point, trying to change who I was to get someone to like me. Because I had that phase – ew.

I definitely recall going back to a toxic ex or two, eating up every word they said in those “I want you back” texts or late-night calls.

But when I hit my mid to late twenties, the lights went off – I realized that most times exes usually only came back because they were horny, or lonely. And what self-respecting person would want to subject themselves to someone who treated them as an option?

As an adult, I know we all have needs, but the cool thing about being a mature adult is being able to remind yourself that there is plenty of dick on Planet Earth. Seriously, there’s no shortage. So if you are just wanting physical, hop on Tinder and see who catches your eye. As long as you’re open and honest about what you’re seeking, no one can be mad. And I promise it’s much healthier to find a fresh friend with benefits than hook up with your toxic ex. If hookups aren’t your jam, invest in a vibrator – or two.

Remember: things end for a reason. Stop trying to force a corner puzzle piece to fit in the middle.

Exes have this gauge that tells them when you are happy and have moved on. It’s almost like they intentionally want to disrupt your peace.

If you’re thinking he cares because he watches your Instagram story or texted you an “I miss you” at 2 am – I can promise he doesn’t.

Exes reach out to keep you in their rotation. It’s a way to have you, but without the commitment, and you deserve better.

Whenever you’re missing someone who did you wrong, remember why things ended.

I’m not against giving things a second chance, but the best apology is changed behavior.