The Girl in Gucci Glasses

I’m making today’s blog post not out of a place of judgment, but a cautionary tale from an elder millennial.

Let’s just hit the ground running.

Why are you buying your situationship gifts?

When I tell you I almost fell out of my chair upon scrolling multiple social networks and seeing girls ask what to get their situationship for not only major holidays, but daily “pick me ups.”

Girl, what?

To those who might be questioning not only this post but what a situationship is entirely, let’s break it down:

A situationship is where two consenting adults are basically friends with benefits with the illusion or empty promise of the potential for more.

Usually, women are the ones that fall victim to this scam, but men sometimes do too.

So what’s the difference between a situationship and a friend with benefits? Well, in theory, a FWB is strictly dickly. You are using this person just for casual fun with zero desire for more. Sometimes this is solidified by one or both partners being emotionally unavailable.

If you were to ask my friend Jess about the difference she would say there isn’t one, but I like to think there is…even if it’s minuscule. Not everyone wants a relationship or to settle down, and as long as people are honest and safe – that’s a-okay in my book.

But back to situationships, let’s address the real issue: when you commit to having a relationship without the labels, you’re basically allowing yourself to be the placeholder for when your situationship finds the person they actually want to be with.

Society continues to push this “cool girl” narrative where we as women allow ourselves to sacrifice our values and integrity for approval points.

Listen, if you don’t want to do casual sex, or have a situationship – that’s amazing and don’t be bullied into either of these things because at the end of the day, who wouldn’t want a committed, healthy and loving relationship?

While you sit and wait for this situationship you’re with to be “ready” to settle down with you, you’re missing out on the person who knows they want to be with you and is ready now to commit to you.

Time is your most precious commodity and you won’t get it back, so stop wasting yours with someone emotionally unavailable and who is all but telling you they don’t want to date. Chances are they do want to date, it’s just not you.

And to my crazy girlies, babe. No matter how good you are in bed, it will not convince a man to date you if he does not want to. You are just dragging things out and when that bandaid gets ripped off, it’s going to hurt like a b.

Listen to the pod as I break down situationships on Apple and Spotify.