Let’s cut the shit.

Everyone has trauma. Yours doesn’t make you special. It doesn’t make you deep. It doesn’t give you automatic moral high ground or make you more “raw” than the person next to you. That sounds harsh, right? Good. Because someone needs to say it.

We live in a culture that’s OBSESSED with trauma. Instagram captions? Trauma. TikTok trends? Trauma. Dating app bios? “Just a broken soul looking for peace” eye roll so hard I better call my neurologist. Trauma has become a brand. And honestly, it’s tired.

Trauma Is Human, Not a Personality Trait

You know what’s actually special? Healing. Growth. Accountability. Being kind to other people even though you’ve been through hell. That’s the real flex. Not leading with your sob story.

You’re not the only one with childhood wounds, daddy issues, abandonment scars, or an ex who almost sent you on a grippy sock vacation. We’ve all got that messy little file cabinet of internal chaos. Some people just aren’t using it as their whole identity.

Stop Romanticizing Your Pain

Having trauma doesn’t make you original. Processing it might. Owning your narrative without letting it own you? That’s rare. That’s powerful. But pain isn’t a personality. It’s an experience. One that you should choose to work through.

People can smell when you’re trauma-dumping for attention compared to when you’re actually doing the inner work. One smells like desperation. The other smells like peace.

Healing Isn’t Sexy. It’s Gritty As Hell.

Working through trauma isn’t cute. It’s not aesthetic. It’s therapy sessions where you leave crying and snotting into a paper towel. It’s apologizing for the ways you projected your pain onto people who didn’t deserve it. It’s learning to sit with silence instead of chaos. It’s boring, brutal, and freeing.

If you’re using your trauma as a shield, a weapon, or a microphone, maybe it’s time to pause. What would you be without the pain? Who are you outside the wound?

You Can’t Heal If You Keep Making It Your Brand

Here’s the thing: you deserve healing. You deserve softness. You deserve a life that doesn’t revolve around your past. But you can’t get there if your trauma is still the main character in your story.

So stop romanticizing brokenness. Stop mistaking pity for power. Start doing the hard shit. That means the uncomfortable work of healing, and keep it pushing. Because the real ones? The ones who’ve really been through it? They’re not posting about it every day. They’re too busy living for their future.